Monday, December 1, 1986

December 1986 - from my journal

December 1, 1986
Well Christmas is less than 1 month away.  I don't suppose this Christmas will be as nice as last. It couldn't be.  We don't have hardly any money, and although we are working in the mink, and with Roger's Sunday pay, I still think there won't be too much to spend on Christmas.  We are paying our property taxes today $196.53, and we owe the car payment $186.76, and the house payment $569.00, and a car insurance payment $114.00.  Somehow our bills always add up to more than we have, but we pay our full tithing and we are taken care of.  I know the law of tithing is true  I bear testimony of it.  I am so glad that at tithing settlement this year, I can truthfully, happily, and wholeheartedly state, YES!!!!  I AM a full tithe payer.  Oh I remember last year how sad I felt that once again, I wasn't.  And this year is the first year in MY WHOLE LIFE that I AM.  The VERY FIRST. And I know why.  I have been changed.  Not as dramatically (to others) as Alma the younger's experience with the angel might seem, but I know what I feel and I am a different person.  I will always go on and try harder to do what my Heavenly Father wants me to do.  I love my family so much, and  I want to be a good example for the kids. I want to teach them about our Heavenly Father and how He loves them and cares for them, and how they need to pray to Him always.  We are still reading the Book of Mormon nightly as a family, and we are on Book 10.(This is the illustrated children's version)  When we get finished we'll start over again.  I want Rog and I to teach our kids what is right.  Well it's mink day again today.  Lyle put off killing his darks, so we'll probably just be longer in the end.  Still no Christmas shopping done yet.

December 3, 1986
Well it's almost time to go to work, but I thought I'd write a little bit.  We are all well.  Tonight is Calvin Stephen's class (This was a class where he taught us about one of the standard works, I can't remember which one!)  I look forward to it, as I do other things.  I love the Book of Mormon.  I love to read it.  Today I read about Helaman's 2000 young warriors.  It was great.  I have a testimony.  I love my Heavenly Father.  I am happy.

December 5, 1986
I hate to get up in the mornings.  It's 5:20 a.m. and I'm so tired.  Today is another day in the mink for me.  It looks like we might be working clear up till Christmas this year.  Sometimes I wonder if it's all worth it.  I'm so tired at night.  All I do is sit and relax in front of the TV, and I know that's not good.  I remember when we were building our house we hardly ever watched TV.  I kinda wish Rog was back on nights.  I'm so tired.

December 6, 1986 - Letter from Brenda in Okinawa
Dear Roger and Gwen,  I just thought I would write you a letter and tell you thanks for the birthday present you guys sent me.  I guess I really surprised my mom by being 16 this year.  I can't believe that I'm old enough to drive.  I think my parents are going to let me take the Driver's Ed class that lasts about 4 to 5 weeks about two times a week.  They really don't think I am tall enough to reach the steering wheel yet, but I'll show them.  The only problem is that it costs $130.00  to take the class on Kadena, and they don't have in in my school.  Anyways, I thought I would tell you what I got for my birthday.  I got a gold plated watch from my mom and dad.  Terri gave me some porcelain dolls that sit on my dresser.  They are a boy sailor and a girl sailor.  They sit by each other and smooch.  I loved them.  On my birthday, my mom said we weren't going to go out to eat for my birthday, and I got mad so she told me why they wouldn't take me out.  They didn't even make me a cake.  I thought something funny was going on, so she finally told me that they had planned a birthday party for me the day after my birthday.  Why they planned it Saturday, was because the in Dad's Detachment 35, we knew these people, and their boy's birthday was the 1st of December, so they planned it with them and Brandy's mom.  I can't believe that they didn't blurt it out that they were going to have a birthday party for us two.  Brandy knew about it for longer than a week.  I can't believe that she didn't blurt it out to me.  Well, I better go for now.  Thanks again for the birthday present.  Tell the kids we miss them too!  Love, Brenda

(Approximately December 1986) - Letter from Linda
Dear Roger, Gwen, Mandy and Zac, Well, it's almost time for that jolly old man in the red suit to hit.  Are all of you ready?  I think he just might skip this house, we just haven't found the spirit of Christmas yet.  But we're trying real hard. It's pretty hard without all of you here with us.  We sure do miss you.  All the family get togethers, just plain everything.  We can't wait to come home and have Rog on a normal shift so we can all chase at night again.  We got the package you sent, thanks a lot.  So how is the minking going now?  I bet you'll both be glad when that's over with.  But it's nice for some extra cash right at Christmas time.  How has everyone been feeling lately?  We're fine.  Todd has a little bit of the flu today.  And today I frosted Terri's hair a little bit.  How are the kids doing in school?  Do they still like it?  I bet you are really enjoying your house at this time of the year.  How is your road holding up?  Also, your wood supply?  Terri's boyfriend comes over quite a bit.  He's fun to have around.  He works the boys over, just like Rog used to do.  So they will be in great shape for a work out when we come home.  Course, if Rog keeps slapping on the weight, he just might be able to get the best of them.  We put our tree up last week.  And it looks pretty good.  I wish it had a good smell with it though.  There are no Christmas lights over here to go look at.  Only the insides of the few stores on-base are decorated.  Are you guys still driving the same vehicles?  We sure need to buy us another car.  It's hard going from 3 at home to 1 here.  But we're going to try and buy a van in the spring.  Well, I'll sign off for now.  We sure miss you, and love you,  Love, Linda

December 8, 1986
One year ago today I had my miscarriage.  I wonder if anyone remembers.  What are my feelings on this?  I don't know.  I feel numb sometimes and so mixed up.  I'm calling the doctor today.  Roger is having pains in his chest and arm and nosebleeds.  I think we are both kinda scared.

(Approximately December 1986) - Letter from Linda
Dear Rog, Gwen and kids, It's 6:00 a.m. and I'm just waiting to go to work (yuk)  So I thought I'd write.  It's so good to get your letters, it boosts our spirits.  And this time of year, we need that!  It's so hard being away from home.  The weather here has been nice again lately, in the mid 70's.  So believe it or not, we miss the snow.  Christmas is not the same without it.  The mail over here is shipping some (snow) in for one day.  Please let me know how Zac's eyes are.  I know that's a worry.  When Darrin was little, I took him to Joni's doctor and he had a little bit of a lazy eye, but he outgrew it.  Seems like you always have worries when you have kids.  Also, how is Rog feeling now?  That's scary.  I hope it's nothing.  Maybe it's age?  So are both of you ready to dump the mink business?  Your having a long season this year.  What, hasn't it been cold enough?  Tomorrow is the kids last day for 2 weeks and they are in heaven.  They hate getting up at 5:30.  We'll have to send you some pictures of the boys playing ball.  They look pretty tough in their suits.  Speaking of pictures, those you sent us are darling.  Your kids have grown a lot since we left.   Isn't it about time for another addition?  (ha ha)  We are so excited about mom and  Joni and kids coming.  Actually, we have decided that's our Christmas presents.  Mom said Uncle Don might come.  That would be fun.  It's funny, Terri loves it here, and last night is the first time Brenda said she really likes it now.  The boys still say it's o.k.  The key is keeping everyone busy.  School work does that!  Well, it's time for me to go now.  You guys have a Wonderful Holiday Season.  Remember, we love and miss you always.  Love, Linda

December 13, 1986
Roger's pains turned out to be nothing serious.  They did an EKG, and it's not his heart.  Only a few more days to go in the mink.  Probably Tuesday or Wednesday.  But I'm gonna help box and take off the boards, so I may work longer.  I'm supposed to go in today, but Zac is sick and he had a high fever last night.  Today is my Christmas lesson at church.  I hope I can give it.  Maybe I can leave Zac at Grandma Dickson's.  We got a little shopping done Friday night for Christmas.  Still allot more to go though.  We brought the tree up last night, and I cleaned the house really good.  I've still got scads of baking to do.  Well I better get moving.

December 17, 1986
Last night was our County and City Christmas party.  It was fun.  Working in the mink is over yea!!!!!!!!!!!  I still have allot of Christmas shopping to finish up.  Things most always look brighter in the morning.  I'll go on and try my hardest and do my best.  I want us all to be happy.  I'm sorry for the many mistakes I have made in my life and in the lives of others.  I hope my Heavenly Father can forgive me.  I wish I could know for sure.  

December 18, 1986
Well, one week from today!!!  The kids are sure excited. I want them to remember the real reason we celebrate Christmas, so I think this Christmas Eve we will read the story from the Bible before going to bed.  I've also got to invite Mom and Dad and LuAnn and Ben up for breakfast Christmas morning.  I THINK I can handle that.  I bought Roger a triple combination for Christmas yesterday for $15.00.  I hope that's a good price.  I think he'll be excited, because then when we start Calvin Stephen's classes again in January, he'll have his own.  We had a good talk last night while I cleaned up the kitchen.  After the first of the year he's going to look into going back to school. (He never did)

December 22, 1986
I felt rotten today.  My stomach has hurt all day.  My house is a mess.  The kids are finally in bed.  I'm so lazy. I need to lose 20 pounds so bad.  I feel rotten all the time.  I delivered plates of cookies yesterday. I hope they were appreciated. Shirley Lannefeld (my old friend from Browning) called me today and we gabbed for awhile.    My Christmas shopping's all done.  Everything's wrapped.  Thank goodness. I just got through reading "Links of Forever", a genealogy book.  It makes me wonder what I should be doing for my ancestors.  I think it's all been done.  I'll have to ask mom.  This house needs serious cleaning before Christmas.  We read from the Book of Mormon tonight.  Amanda seems to really enjoy it.  Zac asked for a prayer to help him not be afraid.  I think that's neat.  Well I better close for now and read Jesus the Christ.

December 23, 1986
Working all day today.  Home for lunch to wrap presents.  Our family pictures came, finally.  Mom and LuAnn will sure be excited. (This family picture I'm refering to is the one or Rog and me and Amanda and Zac.  I'm in a grey skirt, and Amanda in a blue dress.  We are all dressed in greys, whites and light blues) Got Rog a surprise at Valley Implement. (gloves)  I'm happy.

December 29, 1986 - Letter from Brenda
Dear Rog and Gwen,  Hi!  Thanks for the letter!  Sounds like you are all doing fine.  So what did you all get for Christmas?  I got a 35mm camera, and all the rest was some shirts and china things to sit on my dresser.  We watched your video Christmas Eve.  It was great.  Your house is gorgeous.  The only thing wrong was that you were turning too fast (in the video you did), but that's okay anyway.  We have filmed us on our video camera the last week or so, and when it is filled we are going to send it to all of you guys.  Zac and Amanda are getting really tall.  Wish we could see them!  Tomorrow is New Years Eve, I guess we will stay home because mom and dad have nowhere to go this year.  Well, I guess I'll close for now.  Tell the kids hi!  Love you all lots, Brenda  P.S. Thanks again for the tape.

(Approximate date?)
Fran Turner was teaching Young Women's and asked me to audio tape my feelings  about my experiences as a teenager, and having to get married so early, etc.  After the girls in her class listened to the tape, they wrote responses back to me.  Here is Fran's response and then the girls:

Dear Gwen, The tape you made for me was done exactly like I wanted.  The girls listened very closely, and I think they really were impressed with what you talked them.  I was.  I appreciate your experiences and thank you for being willing to share them with us. I think you realize how important it is to teach these young women to set their standards high and not to let anything deter them in reaching their goals.  I want very much to see them make the right choices and I think you've helped in that respect.  I worry about their temptations and challenges.  Things most of them aren't even aware of yet, but they have to be strong enough to make it through them.  I also want good things for you.  I know you have to be strong to make it through the trials you face.  I would like very much to see your family sealed in the temple and enjoy all those blessings.  Keep working for it, it's certainly worth any effort!  God bless you.  Love, Fran

1.  When you talked about how we should listen to our parents in your tape, it really got to me, because I'm starting to think that my parents don't know anything, but I'll try to listen to them.  I'm going to try to do what my parents say.  I won't date until I'm 16.  Listening to your tape will help me a lot.  Thank you.
2.  Thanks so much for telling us about some of the problems you've had in your life.  Boys are really fun, and I thought that my parents didn't trust me to go to dances or games, but now I know that they really care about what I do, and don't want to see me make the wrong choices, and mistakes.  The things you have said have really got through, Thanks.
3.  These are the things I heard in you tape that I liked.  A close relationship with your parents.  A lot of people say that they get so mad at their parents.  They also say they hate their parents.  But I have a real close relationship with my parents and I don't think I will ever have that problem of dating until I'm 16. When you talked about not having a close relationship with your parents, it made me feel really bad for you.
4.  I feel now that after listening to you speak, that I will have a closer relationship with my parents.  I'll also listen to my parents more.  I also think that when I choose my husband, that I'll make sure that we can go to the temple to be married.  I also think I'll pay more attention to the lessons at church.
5.  I was visiting Sister Fran's class today as a Stake Leader.  I was filled with the spirit that you were trying to put over to some very special girls.  They are at the very impressionable age living in a time that is so troublesome.  Your thought were so very good, and the girls, I could see were very impressed and deep in your thoughts.  I pray the Lord might bless you and your family always.
6.  I will really follow the things of listening to our parents, and not dating.  Boys are ok., but I'm not really interested in them.  I look at some girls my age who are doing things they aren't supposed to.  One girl I know always is with a boy.  She is never without having a boyfriend, and I wished I could help her, but she just thinks it's great having a boyfriend.  I look at her and I think she is really ruining her life.  When I get married, I have had my mind set on getting married in the temple and going to college to be a future nurse and I intend to set these goals.  I love my family very much.  I will always listen to my parents.  I will stay close to my Heavenly Father, and I know where to find him if I need to.
7.  Thanks for making that tape for our class.  It will really start me thinking when a boy asks me out on a date before I'm 16.  The other day a boy asked me to go with him to the Homecoming dance.  My mom told me I couldn't go because I can't date until I'm 16.  I was really glad that I didn't go with him.  I had a really fun time at the dance without a date even.  After what I heard on your tape, I was really glad I didn't go with him.  Thank you again for that tap.  I'm sure I will remember it for a long time.

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